Artificial Love
by littleblackghost
Summary: An old name from the past arises in Evelyns daughters files, causing her to contact the family she tried to leave behind. ON SMALL HIATUS UNTIL I GET MY BRAIN WORKING
1. Chapter 1

I yawned silently as I typed profusely away on my laptop. It was almost midnight and here I was, stuck in the office. And it was a Friday night.

Oh yes, any other girl of my age would have been out with their girlfriends, most likely drunk and dancing like a lunatic at this point.

But oh no, not me. Not Christiana Mainland. I just had to be in the office, finishing updating my work and no play, I thought to myself.I leaned back on my chair and stretched.

_Ah well_, I thought to myself, _at least I'm doing something worthwhile._

I looked at the lonely case study sitting by my laptop.

I smiled as I thought about returning home after this last update.

A nice mug of hot chocolate, Wuthering Heights and a long lie in tomorrow.

Yup, that sounded good.

I picked up the case study and skimmed through the opening summary.

There was a photograph attached to the top of the page with a paperclip.

I bit my lip.

The photo looked familiar, but I could quite place the mans rough face. He had tousled murky blonde hair, familiar dark blue eyes.

I sighed as I keyed the name into my computers search bank.

"Donnie….Jenkins…" I said the name out loud.

In seconds a file appeared on the screen.

I felt my heart stop as I read the first few lines. Donnie Jenkins.

I knew why that name was familiar.

I felt bile rise in my throat.

I'm gonna be sick, I thought, as I rushed from my chair to the nearest bathroom.


	2. Chapter 2

[Five Years Previously]

I groaned as I slid further down the sofa. The English literature note book slipped from my heads as I cringed at the noise emitting from the hallway.

"Great," I sighed, "There goes my studying."

Senior year and I had my finals coming up. But living in this house, there was almost no chance I was going to pass.

I looked up as my mother walked in, her rosy cheeks shining as she grinned.

"Hey sweety" She said, sitting her handbag on the sofa next to me.

"Mother!" I whined, nodding my head in the direction of the hallway, loud yells still breaking through.

"Bobby!" She hollered, "keep it down, your sister's trying to study!"

A stout young man walked in, his hair covered in melting snow.

"Aw come on Tiana! It's the first snow of winter!" He smiled at me.

I rolled my eyes.

He was 4 years older than me, yet was still the most mature.

"Bobby, unlike some people, I feel the need to do something with my life!" I sniped.

His smile faded.

"Christiana, there is no need for that!" My mother scolded me.

I rolled my eyes again. Of course. Like little prince Bobby could do anything wrong in his ma's eyes.

I picked up my book and headed for the stairs. At least I could get some peace there.

In the hall I looked up at a teenage boy stripping of a wet denim jacket.

His hair was soaking wet. And dripping all over the floor.

"Jack, you're drenching the place!" I moaned.

He looked up at me, "Lighten up Chrissie!"

"Uggh!" I grunted and ran to my room, slamming the door.

Ever since I had woken this morning, I had decided I would be difficult.

I hated Detroit. I always had.

When mother and father had divorced, I didn't even need to be asked who I wanted to go with.

Daddy. I was always a daddy's girl.

Sure, I knew it was his fault they divorced. He was a little rough at times. Ok, maybe more than a little rough. And he did like to play around.

But he was the perfect father. I didn't even need to ask for anything, he always knew what I needed.

Not like my mother.

Oh no.

Evelyn Mercer was an angel to most people. She was the best case worker in the whole Detroit adoption service.

But that was my problem.

She was always too damn busy looking after all these poor, unfortunate orphan kids to care about her own daughter.

And that's where Bobby and Jack came in.

I had four step brothers in total.

Bobby came home with mum first. I was only seven years old, and staying with mother over Summer vacation. She and my father had finalised the divorce just a few months earlier.

One night she came home around 2am, this little 11 year old in tow.

I was fast asleep on my babysitters lap when I was shocked awake by the noise of this boy talking to my mother.

"Christiana, this is Bobby. Bobby, this is my daughter, Christiana." Mother had said.

I looked at her in disbelief. I knew she was lonely from the break up, but now she was bringing work home?

Bobby looked me up and down. I just stared at him.

"Bobby is gonna stay with us for a little while" Mother had explained.

Yeah, I thought, right.

And I was right. That little while escalated into weeks, then months. Then my mother full on adopted him.

To be fair, I couldn't say very much about Bobby. He fit right into treating me like a little sister.

If any of the local kids picked on me when I was visiting, he was always the first to stick up for me.

I couldn't lie, when I thought about it. I loved Bobby. He was quite possibly the best big brother anyone could hope for. He'd look out for me, play with me when no one else would. He was the best.

Next came Jeremiah. Jerry came along in quite the same way Bobby did, my mum just showing up with him at random.

I hadn't known much about Bobby's past, but Jerry took the time to explain to me why he came to us.

His mother had dumped him of the steps of a church when he was only a day old. He'd been shifted around ever since. He'd gotten into gangs and stealing at the age of ten. He came to us when he was eleven, just a year younger than Bobby. Bobby had been living with us a year by then.

Again, I couldn't say anything against Jeremiah, he was respectful to me, my mother, and even my father when he came to collect me or drop me off. Bobby was never as courteous.

Angel showed up not long after Jeremiah. He was only a year older than me, but we had never really clicked. Not like me and Bobby. We got along, but I didn't like his lifestyle.

He thought he was a ladies man, at 13!

The last to come to us was Jack.

I didn't like Jack. Not at all.

He was everything I wasn't. He was a year younger than me, but the way everyone fussed over the little punk you would have thought he was a baby!

My mother brought him home one afternoon in the Fall when I was at my daddys.

It was my mothers turn to have me for Christmas that year. I knew I had a 'new brother' as my mother put it over the phone, but I hadn't known what to expect.

When my taxi pulled up outside the house, he was standing there with the rest of the family. Little twelve year old Jack Mercer, holding hands with Bobby.

It wasn't until I got out of the cab that I saw his face.

I'd never seen a kid with so many cuts and bruises on show.

"Tiana," Bobby had said when I got to the door, "this is Jackie".

"That's a girls name," I had said, glaring at him as I stalked past.

I tried to keep my distance from him as much as possible that holiday. My mother and Bobby tried to make us friends, but I didn't want a new brother. I didn't need one.

I had accepted the others, but I didn't need this one.

_I was the baby of the family! How dare they replace me?!_


	3. Chapter 3

I returned to my office chair and switched my laptop off as fast as I could. I couldn't do this. Not tonight.

I had to think about this. I had to calculate what to do.

I snatched up the Jenkins file and tossed it into my bag.

On the drive home I could feel it burning, the name constantly ringing in my ears.

------------------------

In my senior year, my father had sent me to stay with my mother.

Everyone knew I wasn't happy about this.

I was stuck in Detroit with a family I didn't want. A family I felt I was too good for.

I was so used to the fine life my daddy had always treated me to.

I didn't like having to do chores, or helping with dinner.

And my mother always had to pair me with Jack when it came to our chores.

Jack never once complained. He was always happy to do anything his mom told him.

I tried my best to ignore Jack as much as I could.

Even in school that year, when I didn't have any friends. I still didn't want to know him.

He had his own little crowd. His little group of outcasts.

How I loathed him when I saw him in the hallway by his locker, laughing and joking.

Whenever he asked me to join them I would just give him the look he was so used to seeing from me at home. I was not going to tolerate him. Not now, not ever.

I wasn't a Mercer, like the boys. I was a Mainland, and I intended to stay one.

One day I was standing by my locker when a group of cheerleader slammed my door shut in my hand.

I screamed as I heard the bones crunching, tears rolling down my cheeks. I slid to the floor, cradling my bruising hand.

The laughed at me as I sat there, sobbing.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" A voice hollered out.

I looked up briefly to see Jack storming over, throwing his school bag to the ground.

"Oh lookie girls," one of the airheads exclaimed sarcastically, "here comes Mercer to save his sister."

They giggled as they walked away.

Jack was on his knees, trying to help me up, but I shoved him away with my good hand.

"I don't need your help," I whimpered, "you're not my brother."

He looked at me, annoyed.

"I'm just trying to help you, ok? You don't need to be such a bitch!"

He got to his feet and walked off, grabbing his fallen bag.

I managed to get myself to the girls bathroom to inspect my hand in the privacy of a cubicle.

I knew it was broken. I could feel the delicate broken bones.

I felt sick and dizzy.

I wanted to be home. I wanted my daddy. I just wanted out of this place.

I spent the next ten minutes convincing myself I had to go to the nurses office to be sent home. I knew Bobby or Jerry would be home. I hoped it would be Jerry. He would take me to hospital and agree to any stupid lie I make up to my mother and Bobby.

I left the girls bathroom, and within seconds I was pinned against a wall.

Not again, I whimpered silently.

This time it was a boy. One of the football team.

I hated Jocks more than I hated cheerleaders. And that was saying something.

I noticed there was no noise. Class must have went into session whilst I was in the bathroom.

I looked at his face.

"What do you want Davie?" I said, trying to push him away.

He held onto me harder, "I've been watching you Mercer…" He grunted.

"Mainland. My name is Mainland." I said.

I couldn't believe I was arguing my second name at a time like this.

I knew what he meant, however. I'd caught him watched me countless times.

Infact, I was more than positive he had followed me home on more than one occasion. Those were times I had made sure I stuck close to Jack and his friends, or at least made sure I was in screaming distance.

I wanted to scream as I felt him run his hand down my thigh.

Oh dear Lord, I thought, wanting to cry. My voice wouldn't work.

At that moment I all but gave up on this Hell hole. This run down school with no CCTV, unlike my Memphis school. The fact I had no friends to save me. The fact my daddy wasn't here. At that moment I hated him too, for shipping me down here, just so he could run off with his girlfriend on exotic vacations.

At that moment, I gave up.

I felt my legs go weak as I heard a crashing sound as I was freed.

I fell to the floor and looked up.

There, in a pile of the floor, was Jack, sitting on top of Davie, pummelling his face.

I couldn't believe my eyes.

I shifted closer to the wall. I realised I was hyper ventilating.

I felt someone touch my shoulder and I yelped.

It was Ginger, one of Jacks friends. I saw the hallway start to fill, and several teachers pulling Jack off Davie. Ginger was now on her knees trying to hold me closer.

_Was she hugging me? _I thought confused.

Sound suddenly burst into my ears, make me cringe.

I could hear Jacks voice above everything else.

"You asshole! Don't you EVER go near her again! I swear to fucking God I will kill you! I'll cut your fucking throat!"

The next hour was a blur. I remember the nurse bandaging my hand, saying I could go to the hospital when my mother arrived. I was sat outside the headmasters office while my mother and Bobby spoke with him.

Jack faced me from across the hall, a look of sheer hatred on his face.

I wasn't sure if it was me he was angry with, but I wouldn't meet his eyes.

My mother and Bobby soon left the office.

"Would you like to tell me what happened?" She asked in a cross voice, which seemed to be directed at Jack.

"It wasn't his fault," I heard my voice say, "he was only protecting me."

Everyone looked at me incredulously. Even I couldn't believe I had said it.

"Mom," Jack began, his face softening, "He had her against the wall…he was trying to…" His face contorted into a pained expression. I looked up at Bobby who was just staring blankly at Jack.

"You did good kid," He said, walking over and pulling him into an embrace.

"Let's get you to the hospital," my mother said, putting her arm around my waist and leading me out.


	4. Chapter 4

I settled down on my sofa, my hands shaking as I held the warm cup of tea to my lips.

I thought that the shower would have made me feel better, but it hadn't.

I guess nothing makes those kinds of thoughts disappear.

My eyes looked around the room, as they often did when I was searching in my mind for sense.

I locked on to the large framed picture in the centre of my mantelpiece. It was an old picture, and it always made me smile.

There was me, my mother, and my four step brothers.

Everyone is smiling. Everyone but me.

------------------------------------

Jack and I didn't go into school the day after the attack. The school was debating on whether or not Jack should be suspended, and mother said I needed to rest.

I was lying on the sofa, my fresh cast sitting on my stomach.

I hated that thing. It was so heavy.

If I were back in Memphis it would have been ok, because I would have had friends around me, decorating the horrible thing.

It was around noon when Jack walked into the living room, still dressed in the boxers he had worn to bed.

"How the hand?" he yawned, stretching out on an arm chair facing me.

"Fine." I answered, a little more hostile that I had intended.

"Shit, I was just concerned!" Jack retorted leaving the room.

I sighed and got to my feet.

Maybe I had been a little hard on the kid.

I followed him into the kitchen, where he was putting on the kettle.

"Uh, Jack?"

He turned to face me.

"Do you, uh, wanna sign my cast?"

I felt stupid just saying it.

He looked at me, trying to suss out whether I was trying to wind him up.

"Sure." He smiled.

---------------------------------------

I sat with my address book on my lap, tossing my cell phone from hand to hand.

I knew I had to make the call.

It was against everything I was trained to do.

Adoption agencies don't give out private details!

I looked at the case study on the floor next to me. Every time I saw those dark blue eyes I felt sick.

I knew what I had to do.

I punched in the number in the book.

I held my breath as the phone rang out.

I heard a male voice answer.

"Hello?"

"Hi Jerry, it's Christiana. I need to talk to you…"


	5. Chapter 5

As Jack and I sat at the kitchen table whilst he doodled away on my cast, I couldn't help but be amazed by the boy.

Here he was looking after me, when all I had done was make his life a misery.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" I blurted out.

He looked up from his sketch of what looked like a fat ginger cat.

"Why shouldn't I be?" He asked, giving me a confused look.

"I've never been nice to you." I shrugged.

He let go of my arm and sat back, looking at me.

"I guess…" He began, "I feel sorry for you."

I gawped.

"WHY?"

He laughed. "Well, here you are, a happy little kid, got everything you ever wanted, and then your mom and dad break up, and suddenly your mom starts bring you home these boys who are suddenly your new brothers, without you having any say."

Was I THAT easy to read?

He looked at me and laughed again.

"What's so funny?" I muttered.

"This is the longest conversation we have had in the four years I've been here."

I thought about it, and he was right.

"I can't have came across as a nice person," I thought, biting my lip.

Jack shrugged, "You're a challenge."

A challenge, I thought over in my head.

"How about," Jack said, getting to his feet, "I make some popcorn and we watch a DVD? No one is gonna be home for a while, may aswell make the most of a day off."

I looked up at his smiling face.

My God he had the loveliest blue eyes.

"Sure," I said, and for the first time, I smiled back.

--------------------------------------

I was stunned that day, as Jack fussed over me. He made me tea, popcorn…he wouldn't even let me move to change the DVD!

Since when was he a gentleman? I thought to myself.

"What do you fancy now?" He asked as the credit rolled from the second movie of the day.

I glanced at the clock. Mum and Bobby wouldn't be home until at earliest 7pm, and God only knew when Angel and Jeremiah would trek home.

"How about," I began slowly, "We just talk."

Jack eyed me cautiously, "Talk?"

"Yeah. Talk. I really don't know you, despite the fact we've been members of the same family for four years."

Jack slouched back. "Well, what do you wanna know?"

I was wishing he would stop smiling at me when he spoke. He had such a warm smile.

"Well, why were you in care in the first place?"

His face dropped, and I could have swore he cringed back.

"Any questions except those ones." He said, looking down at his hands in his laps.

"Oh come on! I know almost everything that can possibly happen in care homes and foster homes and everywhere else!"

He looked at me doubtfully.

I sighed, "Ok Jack. I'll tell you a secret."

He looked interested. "Go on."

"When I graduate, do you know what I want to do?"

He shook his head.

"I want to work for the adoption agency."

"NO WAY!"

I almost laughed at the expression on his face.

"You're lying!" He cried, softly shoving my good arm.

"No I'm not…well, only a little."

I slid down the sofa so we were on the same level.

"I don't want to really work with kids, but I'd like to work on the legal side. Dealing with the paperwork, investigations, all that kind of stuff."

"Why on earth would you want to do that?" He sounded deadly serious.

"Well…I don't know, to be honest. I guess it's in my blood." I gave him a small, weak smile.

I didn't know why I wanted to do it. I just always had.

For however I felt about my mother, I knew she was doing a good job. In all her years as a case worker, the only kids she hadn't rehoused were my brothers - hence why they were now my brothers.

"But you still don't want to be like mom." It was a statement.

"Jackie, how in Gods name can you read me?"

He smiled, "I just know you, better than you think…also, you just called me Jackie."

I felt myself blush.

Why the Hell was I blushing?!

Jack sat up straight and looked at me. "Ok," he breathed, "What dya wanna know?"

I looked down at my cast. I almost smiled at his messy writing where he wrote 'Jack Mercer'.

"What happened to your birth parents?" I tried to sound as professional as I could.

He bit his lip, obviously unsure of whether to trust me or not.

"Oh come on Jack! I AM your step sister. If I was to be a bitch about it, you know mom and Bobby would have no problem in killing me…especially when it comes to you."

He looked confused, "What do you mean?"

"Well," I began, partly wishing I hadn't added that last part, "they'd do anything for you. You're the baby."

He laughed, "Yeah, but you're Bobby's Baby Sister. None of us are allowed to look after you, it's always 'that's Bobby's Baby Sister!'"

I smiled. It was true. I was Bobby's Baby Sister.

"Ok," He said, loosening a little, "My parents weren't so good to me, so I got put in an orphanage when I was about five."

"What do you mean 'not so good' to you?"

He lowered his eyes so I couldn't meet them.

"Like, they did bad stuff to me."

"They hit you?"

He nodded.

"They abused you?"

Another nod.

"Jack…did they…like…you know…abuse you….in other ways?"

He didn't move.

Oh shit, I thought. Maybe I had taken this too far.

I took a deep breath.

"It's ok you know. A lot of kids go through it. You've nothing to be ashamed of."

He still wouldn't look at me.

"If you don't want to trust me, ok then."

He looked up, but kept his eyes closed, "No, I do…it's just…" He took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

"When I spoke to mom and Bobby about everything, it was ok. I didn't feel scared or ashamed. But now I'm telling you…"

"What? You're ashamed to tell me?" I was confused.

He shrugged. "I don't know. I feel like you're gonna think it's my fault."

I looked at him, horrified.

"Ok Jackie, I know I'm a bitch, but I'm not going to think like that! COME ON!""I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" He said, a panic in his voice.

Shit, this kid was seriously fucked up if he thought like that.

"Jackie…I'm sorry I've made you feel the way I do. I don't mean it. I guess I just have my own issues."

He cocked his head, "Like what?"

"Oh no you don't! You're not turning this on me!" I half laughed.

"You're the one that wanted to talk!" He scoffed.

I sighed. He was right.

"Ok…I guess I never really wanted anybody else. I just wanted my mom and daddy. Hell, I was pissed when Bobby showed up!"He looked at me, intrigued. "But you love Bobby. Infact, he's the only one you seem to actually want around."

"I do now. But…I guess I just felt like my mother was trying to replace me and my dad. Like she wanted someone else to focus her love on."

"What happened with your dad anyway?"

I gawped at him. "You don't know?"

He shook his head. This should be fun.

"Let's just say he and my mother didn't get along very well. He wasn't very good to her. At all.""He hurt her?" His voice was barely a whisper.

I nodded. "He messed around, had a bit of a temper." I sighed.

"Why the Hell would you have wanted to stay with a woman beater?" He practically snapped.

"Hey! Wait a minute! You don't even know my dad!"

He looked at me with an indignant expression.

"My dad was good to ME. I won't lie, when it comes to his women, he's an asshole. But I'm his little girl. He'd never do anything to hurt me. He cared for me more than she did."

"She is your MOTHER."

"Yeah, and my MOTHER cared more about the kids in the agency than she did for me. Half the time she wasn't even there for my birthdays, my school shows, parent teacher nights…." I looked down.

Why was I even talking to him about this? I never shared this stuff.

"I'm sorry," he said, settling his hand on my colourful cast, "I didn't know all that."

"I'm not saying she's a bad person," I sniffed, trying to hold back the tears that were fighting to escape, "She's the kindest woman ever. I just wished she could have loved me, the way she loves you."

I met his eyes. I think I was starting to see why everyone loved Jack. He was a nice boy. He was easy to talk to.

"I know what you mean," Jack began, shuffling slightly closer to me, "I know how it feels to wish you could be loved better. I guess that's why I love mom so much. She's given me everything that no one else did."

"Meaning?"

"Well, she took me in, after years of be being thrown from hand to hand, she finally gave me stability. She taught me how to be me."

"Well, she could have done a little better with your dress sense…" I teased, indicating his ripped baggy pants.

He smiled and gave me a light shove.

"My parents weren't so good."

I settled back so be were shoulder to shoulder. I didn't want to stare at him, incase he didn't feel comfortable.

I could have laughed, here was me, trying to make Jack Mercer comfortable!

"My dad…he started it when I was about three, I can't remember really…it just always happened. He would just drag me away to his room. My mum didn't care. She was always too high to be bothered about what was going on around her."

I felt his breathing ease next to me.

"I guess one day someone must have called the cops. All I remember is being lifted from my cot by some cop and being taken away. I haven't heard a word about them since."

"Well, they're never gonna get near you again." I said matter of factly.

"Yeah, but that doesn't change how it affected me."

I bit my lip, "what do you mean?"

"Well…like…my first foster home was nice. The old lady was sweet, took good care of me. But she passed away a few months after I arrived. After that it all went downhill again. Half the places I ended up were just as bad as my parents."

My eyes grew wide and I looked up at him, "You mean, they done the same thing."

He nodded, still not looking at me. "I have no idea how people like that are allowed near children. One home I went to, the woman of the house would tie me and video…" He trailed off.

"SHE VIDEO TAPED YOU BEING ABUSED?!" I just about screamed.

He cringed away.

"I'm sorry Jack," I lowered my shaking voice, "I'm sorry…it's just…I mean…how could…"

He nodded. "Like I said, I don't like talking about it."

No wonder, I thought.

"So anyway…" He began again, "Because of that, I have this social complex…well, that's what Bobby calls it." I could have sworn he'd scowled.

"Complex?"

"Girls."

I looked at him confused.

"What do you mean, 'girls'?"

"I don't like being around girls very much."

"You're gay?" I blurted out.

"NO!" He yelled, jumping to his feet, "I'm not gay!"I almost laughed. I had seen him defend himself like this before, whenever Bobby accused him of being gay.

I got to my feet, "Jackie, I don't care if you're gay or not."

"I'm not…I'm not gay…I'm just…scared…"

"Scared?!"

"Yeah…I mean, I don't know how to be around them very much."

"But what about Ginger? She's a girl." I remembered the little red head who had helped me.

"That's different, she's a friend."

Then it clicked.

"You're scared that, because of what happened to you…you won't be able to be with a girl?"

He nodded, blushing.

"Have you ever even kissed a girl?" I asked slyly.

He shook his head, "I try to keep my distance."

He sat down as I stood looking at him. "You're sixteen…and you haven't kissed a girl?" I almost teased.

"And THIS is why people think you're a bitch Chrissie."

I sat down. "Don't call me Chrissie. My name is Christiana." I growled, shoving him as I sat down.

He laughed, "But you let Bobby call you Tiana."

"Yeah, well that's Bobby."

His smile faded to a frown. I felt bad. I couldn't understand why I felt bad.

I had always hated this kid, and now I was sitting here, sharing our life stories.

"Ok, I'm sorry. I won't tease."

He looked at me and I smiled.

"You should smile more." He noted.


	6. Chapter 6

I sat on my bed, thinking about the phone call I had just ended.

I had barely spoken to Jerry at the funeral, so it had practically been years since we had spoken.

I didn't want to say too much, just that I need to speak with him and my other step-brothers.

He seemed pleased enough that I planned on visiting.

Now I just had to make up my mind exactly what to do.

I looked at the case file in front of me. I still hadn't opened it, despite the fact I had carried it almost everywhere with me since I got it.

I slowly picked it up and glared at the picture again.

I took a deep breath and opened the file.

There, that wasn't so hard, I thought.

I began to read through the first page, stating the mans convictions.

"Oh my God…" I whispered, as a tear ran down my cheek.

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Mother had been shocked when she returned how that night with Bobby.

They entered the living room to find Jack and I sprawled across the floor, laughing until we couldn't breathe.

"What the Hell…"Bobby had remarked, a confused look on his face.

All we could do was point at each other as we continued to laugh.

I couldn't remember what it was we were laughing at, but the sight of Jacks red face made me laugh even harder.

I heard my mother tut as she looked at the mess on the floor. We'd raided the kitchen for junk food and just spent the day pigging out.

After a few moments Jack managed to get to his feet, and attempted to help me up.

My mother smiled as she made her way to the kitchen, leaving Bobby to watch us amused.

I finally managed to stop laughing long enough to get to my feet, and fell into Jacks arms.

I looked at him and blushed, pushing myself away slightly.

"Nice to see you two getting along…for the first time ever." Bobby said, falling onto the sofa.

"She isn't that bad after all" Jack smiled at me.

I could feel my heart beat speed up.

"I'm gonna go clean up." I mumbled, indicating the spilled soda on my shirt.

I fled past Jack who stared at me with a confused expression.

"She's been fine all day…" I heard Jack tell Bobby as I closed my bedroom door.

What the Hell is going on? I thought to myself.

-----------------------------------------------

"Five year old son was found tied to bed posts in a spread eagle position…" I read the words aloud, as if that would make them less painful.

I couldn't believe the charges on this guys file.

Sex with minors, rape, child abuse…the list went on and on.

In my mind all I had was the image of this young, murky blonde boy living these nightmares.

I turned the page and gagged.

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I sat silently through dinner, giving short answers.

I could see Jacks puzzled look whenever I ignored him.

I couldn't help it. I didn't know what I was doing. I felt my stomach lurch every time I met his gaze.

"May I be excused?" I asked in a small voice.

"Are you ok sweety?" My mother asked in a concerned voice.

"Yeah…I just feel sick…I think my painkillers are wearing off." I held up my broken hand feebly.

"On you go sweetheart."

I rushed to my room as fast as I could and lay on the bed taking deep breaths. My hand did throb, but that wasn't what was bothering me.

Why on earth could I not get that stupid boys smile out of my head?

I kept hearing his laugh in my mind, and I couldn't help but smile. This was soooooo not happening.

---------------------------------------------------------

I covered my mouth as I looked over the photographs attached to the file.

I knew this job was hard when I took it, but this was horrific.

The medical photographs of this little boy were the most brutal I had seen in my time as a case worker.

If it hadn't been for the information given, I wouldn't have known this little boy was Caucasian, his skin was so darkened by bruises.

I scanned through the attached notations.

"Boy was found bleeding profusely from anal passage…could only open one eye due to bruising…"

I felt that familiar sick feeling rise as I made my way to my bathroom.

---------------------------------------------------------------

I looked at my alarm clock.

2am.

I had been trying for almost three hours to sleep but to no avail.

I had heard everyone else go to bed, but I knew there was one person still awake.

I could hear the gentle strumming of a guitar coming from across the hall.

Normally the fact I could hear this would cause me to storm across the hall bang on the door and scream at him to shut up, before causing a commotion which would end in us both being grounded for waking the whole house.

I slid out of bed and looked at myself in my full length mirror.

Very nice, I thought sarcastically as I looked at my polka dot pyjamas.

I left my room quietly and made my way across the hall.

I tapped softly on the door and entered before I was invited.

Jack had his earphones on so he obviously hadn't heard me.

He jumped a little when he saw me close his door.

He pulled his earphones off, "Shit Christiana, you scared the shit outta me!" He said, getting up to sit his guitar down.

"Sorry," I blushed. I still had no idea what I was doing.

"What's up?" He asked, sitting on the edge of his bed.

He was dressed only in long pyjama bottoms, which again made me blush. I felt my heart rate race.

"I uhm…wanted…to….ah…apologise for dinner." I finally managed.

He smiled, "It's ok. I thought for a second you turned on me again.""No!" I almost shouted, "I was just…not feeling…so good."

He nodded and smiled that smile again.

God I wished he would stop smiling!

"Is everything ok?" He asked, getting up and walking to face me.

"Mmhmm." I nodded, maybe a little too shakily.

"No seriously," he said, putting his hands on my shoulders, "what's wrong? Your shaking."

It seemed I was defying all logic.

At that I moved forward and pressed my lips against his.

I half expected him to push me off, half expecting myself to stop.

Instead he was still for a second, then put his hand on either side of my face, kissing me back.

I felt my hands run through his messy blonde hair.

"WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING?" I was screaming inside.

It seemed like an age had passed when I pulled myself away.

I was breathless as I stared into his shocked eyes.

I tried to compose myself.

"There," I said, backing towards the door, "you're first kiss."


	7. Chapter 7

I lay in bed and hugged my quilt close to my body.

I couldn't get those images from my mind.

The cuts on that little boys wrists were forever burned into my memory.

I tried to focus on the long drive to Detroit I had in the morning.

I would have to call and arrange for someone to cover my shifts at work but I knew it wouldn't be a problem.

I knew my little red Beetle would manage the drive. I would only need a few days worth of clothes.

And anything extra…well, as far as I knew, my mother had kept my room as I had left it, so I expected my belongings would still be in tact.

-------------------------------------------

Breakfast was interesting that morning. I was at the table before the boys, which was an unusual occurrence my mother commented on.

"You seem chipper today." She smiled, setting my cereal down.

I smiled politely, not understand myself why I was so happy.

I hadn't felt this way since before I came him.

One by one my step brothers appeared, Jack being last.

When he saw me he blushed and sat silently and quickly across the table.

"You alright fairy?" Bobby said with a mouth full of bacon.

"Don't call him that Bobby." I scolded in a casual voice.

I felt the room freeze around me.

"Did you just…defend him?" Angel asked, his eyes wide.

"What? You give him too much of a hard time!" I said defensively.

Jack kept his eyes on the plate in front of him.

"But you hate him!" Bobby said defiantly.

As Bobby spoke, Jack twitched a little.

"I don't HATE him, Bobby. That was just horrible."

I couldn't help but smirk. I could feel that I had all this power over Jack, just sitting there.

The rest of breakfast was held in silence.

It was a Saturday, so Jack and I were left in the house again.

"You not going out with your friends?" I asked as I fell into an arm chair after everyone had left.

He shook his head and sat on sofa silently.

"You ok?" I asked, eyeing him.

"Uh-huh." He nodded.

I cocked an eyebrow.

Where was my sudden surge of confidence coming from?

Ever since I had moved here I felt like I'd lost all my confidence. Back home in Memphis I was popular, liked. But here….

Now I felt like I was myself. My old self, getting my own way.

I sat in silence, smiling, as we watched the Saturday morning cartoons.

After a while I moved to get up, when he finally spoke.

"Why did you do that?" His voice shook.

"What? I need the bathroom!" I said defensively.

"No, why did you do that…last night?"

"Why? Didn't you like it?" I smirked.

"No…Yes! I mean…I don't know…" He looked scared and I felt slightly guilty.

"Jack, what the Hell? I only kissed you. Get over it."

I left the room for the bathroom. I felt nervous and I didn't know why.

When I returned he was standing in the centre of the room with his arms folded, waiting for me.

"May I help you?" I said in a polite voice.

"Why did you kiss me?" He demanded.

I sighed, "Jack, get over it ok? It was only a kiss. It's not like I married you without you knowing!"

He didn't relent. "You like me, don't you?"

I froze. No way. That couldn't be right. Could it?

"Get over yourself freak!" I scoffed, trying to push past him to the sofa.

He grabbed my good arm and pulled me closer.

"You do, don't you?" He was half smirking.

No. This was going wrong. I was meant to be the confident one, yet now all I could see was a sudden gain of self esteem in his eyes.

"Jack, seriously, back off."

He leaned forward to kiss me, but I shoved him away.

Instantly I saw the look of hurt in his eyes.

"Sorry…" He whispered, backing off, "I guess I got it all wrong."

At that he turned and left the room.

I stood, stunned.

I had no idea what I had got myself into.

Did I like him? Was that what this was?

I had never really bothered with boys before, minus maybe a make out session at a school dance.

I was always more interested in my studies.

"Oh shit…" I whispered to myself.

I did like him.

---------------------------------------------

I packed my bag slowly in the morning. I hadn't slept very much the night before.

Each time I closed my eyes I was met by the screams of a young boy, much to my despair.

I had already spoken to my manager, who agreed I could do with some time off.

"You work too hard Christiana! I've been telling you to have a week off for months now!" She had laughed.

So that was sorted. I would have plenty of time to get things sorted.

I had time now, to decide how the Hell I was going to do this.

------------------------------------------------

I found Jack sitting on his bed, staring into space.

His eyes looked red.

"Have you been crying?" I asked, startling him.

He quickly rubbed his eyes.

"What do you want?" He asked in an aggravated tone.

I held up a bowl of freshly made popcorn, "Peace offering. Fancy watching a movie with me?"

He looked at me suspiciously.

I sighed and walked in the room. I closed his bedroom door and sat the bowl on his bedside table.

"I'm sorry Jackie." I said, joining him on the bed.

"I shouldn't have been as nasty to you as I have been. You never deserved any of it."

He nodded slowly, "Why do you hate me?"

"I don't hate you Jack."

He looked up at me and met my eyes.

Oh no, I thought, there I go again.

Before I knew it I had pressed my lips against his again, running my good hand through his hair.

He slowly pushed me away.

"What are you doing Chrissie?" He asked softly, confused.

I bit my lip.

"Why did you save me from Davie the other day?"

"You're my step sister." He shrugged, standing up.

"That can't be why. I mean, I'm always so nasty to you, it must be more."

He looked at me uneasily as I stood and walked towards him as he backed away.

Before I knew it he was against the far wall and I was in front of him.

"Just back off Chrissie." He sounded scared. And for some reason, I liked it.

I put my hand against his cheek.

"Jack, I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to show you something."

He looked at me worriedly, but kissed me back as my lips met his.

I could feel his cheeks shaking and I pulled away.

"That so hard?" I smiled.

At that his face flushed a deep red.

"What?" I asked/

He looked at the floor. Or, what I thought was the floor.

"Oh…" I said. Ah. Yes. Of course. Well, that would happen…

"I'm sorry," He said turning his back to me.

"Well, at least I know you're not gay!" I giggled.

"Oh ha ha" Jack sniped sarcastically.

I leaned forward and pressing my cheek against his back.

"Why are you doing that?" He asked, turning to face me, but keeping me at a distance.

"I don't know," I shrugged, walking over and sitting on his bed, "there something about you that makes me feel…like me." I sighed. Yup. This place had finally made me crazy.

I tried in vain to keep my eyes on his face, but it seemed difficult, especially with his constantly folding and unfolding his hands in front of his crotch.

"So…you do like me?" He asked.

I shrugged, "I guess I do."

He walked over and sat next to me.

"So what now?" He asked.

"What do you mean?" I looked at him puzzled.

"Well, do we tell mom or not?"

"Why on Earth would I tell my mother?" I asked in shock.

"Well, are you planning on sneaking in my room more often to spring surprise kissing sessions on me?" He smirked.

I thought about it. I knew I would.

"To be fair, I think it's my turn now," He said.

I looked at him curiously.

He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against mines so I could feel him breathing.

It was erratic.

Without warning he pushed his lips onto my own.

---------------------------------------

I was driving along the highway when I saw my cell phone flash.

MOM : CALLING.

I still had the house saved under as mom. Jerry must be trying to reach me, I thought.

I kept driving, not looking. I wanted to sort my head out before I reached Detroit. It was only a few hours away, and I was basically signing off on my life.


	8. Chapter 8

It was mid afternoon when I pulled up infront of moms house.  
Even though she wasn't here anymore, this would always be moms house.  
The mini van parked out front assured me Jerry was here, waiting for me.  
I tried to pull up to the front of the house as quitely as possible, but I knew they would here me.  
As I sat, composing myself, I saw the front door open.  
And there it was, Jeremiah Mercers big smiling face shining down at me.  
I felt my eyes well up as I undid my seat belt and grabbed my over night bag from the seat next to me.  
"There's my little Chrissie," Jerry grinned, pulling me up into a hug before I had a chance to shut the car door.  
"It's still Christiana, Jere" I almost laughed.  
He pulled away and held me at arms length, looking me up and down.  
"Jere, I haven't changed much in a year..." My voice drifted off.  
Had it really been a year since moms death?  
Jerry tried to force a smile, "Why don't we get inside?"  
I paused, "Is anyone else..."  
Jerry shook his head. "Bobbys at the rink, Angel is...well I don't know where the Hell his ass is. Jack's at college."  
I tried to hide the flash in my eyes as he spoke Jacks name.

I was lying on my bed, studying my now decorated arm cast. Jerry, Bobby and Angel had added to Jacks artwork.  
It was bittersweet; at home, I would have dozens of names on it - here I had my 4 step brothers.  
Think about the word 'stepbrothers' filled me with an odd feeling now.  
I knew Jack and I weren't blood related, but, this wasn't right...was it?  
I knew mom would go crazy. And of course, I would be the one who was to blame. I always was.  
I sighed and turned over in bed, facing my door.  
What had he meant by "it's my turn now"?  
He wasn't actually going to come into my room was he?  
I lay there for what seemed like hours before I fell asleep.  
I was awoken by Bobby banging on bedroom door, "Rise and shine princess! Church is in an hour!"  
I groaned as pulled my sheets over my face.  
I could here Angel and Jack laughing in the hall as they raced downstairs for breakfast.  
I pulled myself out of bed, annoyed.  
What had happened to me? I hated this kid. He was such a loser, and there I was, huffing about over a few kisses.  
What was I even doing?  
I dressed quickly, making sure I didn't put on my best Sunday clothes. I was in a difficult mood.  
I entered the kitchen with a scowl on my face, and sat at the table without looking at anyone.  
"Uh, C? Your shirt buttons are all messed up," Jack commented, a soft smile on his face.  
I looked up and scowled, "You shouldn't be looking at my chest, you perverted freak!"  
I was sure he actually jumped back in shock.  
"CHRISTIANA!" Bobby yelled, getting to his feet, "What the Hell? Apologise right now!"  
Mom just stared at me from across the kitchen.  
I put on the most fake smile I could muster, "I'm terribly sorry baby Jackie."  
"Christiana, what in the Heavens name is wrong with you today?" My mother yelled, walking towards me.  
I stood up and glared at her, "I want to go home! I hate this Hell hole! I hate you, I hate you're stupid step sons, I hate it here!"  
As the words left my mouth, I regretted them. I saw the hurt creep onto every person in the kitchens face.  
I felt my stomach start to knot as I saw the pain and shock on Bobbys face.  
"Get to your room." My mother said in a low voice.  
I didn't try to argue. I ran to my room, slamming the door behind me.  
It had actually happened. I had lost my mind. I sat down on my bed, cradling my broken hand. After a few minutes, I heard mom and the boys leave for church. I got up and watched then get into the car and pull out of the drive way.  
I could see Jack watching me through the window, until the car was out of sight.

As Jerry made tea, I took in my surroundings. Nothing had changed.  
Well, nothing much, other than some mess, which was obviously the result of having 3 young men living in the house.  
Jerry smiled as he handed me my old mug. "You still have this?" I laughed, eyeing the faded Superman logo.  
"Yeah...Jackie is quite sentimental about these things..."  
I nodded, not meeting his eyes.  
"Chris, it's been years, no one even remembers..."  



End file.
